Hijabs, Yarmulkas, and Bare Heads...Oh, My!

By Sylver McGriff

Photos by Sylver McGriff

It was a sight to see: Muslims, Jews and Christians all together in one room, praying, conversing, questioning. Quite a sight - especially in light of America’s recent history with the Middle East, and unfolding events in Israel and Palestine. The unlikely religious gathering on February 18th in the College Avenue Graduate Student Lounge at Rutgers University in New Brunswick - dubbed “Trialogue: A Search for Understanding; Muslims, Christians and Jews in Conversation”- threw together students from various faiths - including a lone atheist - to ask questions of each other. Among the questions provided in a pamphlet handed out to each participant were: “Is Islam under attack right now?", “What stereotypes do you have of different religions?”, “If you had to convert to another faith, which would you choose?” And, as war rages in Israel and Palestine, “Where is the Holy Land, and who has claim to it?”

The event was sponsored by the Catholic Center, Episcopal Campus Ministry, Hillel, Lutheran Campus Ministry, Office of Muslim Chaplain, Rutgers Protestant Campus Ministry, and the Wesley Fellowship, and funded by grants from the General Board of Higher Education and Ministry, and The United Methodist Church. Both undergrad and grad students of many cultures were in attendance.

“I grew up having to pray the Lord’s prayer and recite from the Koran.” says Amytza, a Rutgers SCILS senior of Hispanic-Indian heritage reared by a Muslim father and Catholic mother. Leah, a Jewish graduate student in the field of social work, shares, “I just recently visited my family in Israel, which really solidified my faith.” Across the room, a Caucasian student with blue hair wearing an off the shoulder top above a micro-mini skirt sat beside a fully sheathed Muslim student with only her face and hands exposed. Within minutes, the two were in deep conversation. Present also were a priest in collar, a nun in habit, and a female rabbi; the only missing representative of religious authority was a Muslim imam.

To begin, two students from each faith stood before the gathering to share information about the beliefs of each of their religions. Male Jewish students wearing colorful yarmulkas recited a prayer from the Torah in Hebrew, followed by Christian students, heads bare, reciting the Lord’s Prayer, culminated by a Muslim male and female student - the girl wearing a black hijab (the traditional headcover worn by Muslim women) - who recited passages of the Koran in eloquent Arabic. All spoke of love, peace, and an adherence to their chosen beliefs.

Rabbi Esther Reed, Associate Director for Jewish Campus Life at the university, then divided everyone into small groups. “The focus of the small group is to open your mind and heart to other faiths, ideas, religious practices, and prayers,” quotes the green pamphlet handed around to each group; it is a passage from “The Faith Club,” a book by Ranya Idliby, Suzanne Oliver and Priscilla Warner from which the structure of this Trialogue group is borrowed.

Following the 9-11 attacks, a Muslim mother of two who lived in New York City decided to educate her children about the common ground between Muslim, Jewish and Christian faiths. This decision ultimately led to the writing of a children’s book with two other mothers - Suzanne Oliver, a Christian, and Priscilla Warner, Jewish. The result was “The Faith Club: A Muslim, A Christian, A Jew - Three Women Search for Understanding.” It is the premise of this book on which the Rutgers Trialogue was designed.

As the Rutgers students began forming their Trialogue groups, Rabbi Reed calls out, “If you look around your group and see that everyone is from the same background as you, raise your hand and we’ll come around and switch people up a little bit; the idea is to have a trialogue with those from different religious backgrounds than ourselves.”

This instruction leads to amused return call-outs of, “Too many Jews over here!”, and “We need to switch out some Muslims!” With each call-out, laughter ripples through the room, but not the nervous kind. It is instead a genuine mirth about hearing such things voiced so openly without fear. Everyone here seems to recognize that they are in a ‘safe zone’, an environment in which diversity and humor may coincide.

Within the groups, serious discussion begins. “I thought there were only 2 kinds of Jews,” a Christian says. “The kind that wear beards and black hats, and the kind that don’t.” Two Jewish girls giggle. “No, we come in all kinds of flavors!” one answers. Everyone in the group laughs at this. “There’s Orthodox, Conservative, Reformed, and Reconstructionist Jews - and just about every kind inbetween,” the other Jewish girl clarifies. “In terms of differences, it’s more [about] the levels of practicing.”

An atheist poses a question, “Is it like that with Muslims?” A Muslim responds, “In Islam, there’s Sunni and Shi’a. But [it’s not like] the different kinds of Jews because it’s not about levels of practice. It’s about whether or not there is a belief that the first three khalifs [Islamic religious leaders] who led Islam after the Prophet [Muhammed]'s death had blood relation to the Prophet. Sunnis believe they did, and Shi’as believe they didn’t.”

In another group, a Christian is questioned by a Muslim. “Why do you believe that Jesus was the son of God? What historical proof do you have of that?” The Christian answers, “Well, Jesus performed miracles. Neither the Prophet Muhammed nor Abraham - or whoever Jews believe in as a prophet...wait, what exactly do Jews believe?” Everyone laughs uproariously, after which a Jewish student answers, “Let me educate you, o uninformed Christian!” More laughter. The laughter is genuine glee in the excitement and safety, within this supportive setting, to question, challenge, and learn about varying religious beliefs.

Most interesting about this Trialogue gathering was the underlying feeling of 

willingness: each student seemed genuinely interested and open to views that go completely against all which they believe to be true. In fact, the students at this gathering seemed to welcome an opportunity to absorb new insight about things previously shrouded in mystery. The challenges were respectful, the inquiries were of sincere interest. That, in itself, was a beautiful thing to see.